Emailing a Celebrity Stalker is a Window into Madness
Hello all. As you know from some of my earlier pieces of writing, I’m currently in the midst of hunting for my first post college job. Every day, I hit up TV Jobs, Craigslist, Indeed and other web outlets in hopes that one of the 10+ daily applications I’ve been sending out will finally be the one. Usually, this routine is fairly boring and conventional. But today, oh today was different.
Whilst flipping through the Los Angeles Craigslist, I came across an ad for a “Real Justice League Show”. Being a comic fan of the highest level, I clicked the link and began reading.
I was expecting something along the lines of “Kickass” and what I got was unbridled lunacy.
According to the poster (Who goes by Justin Scott Massler and/or Cloud Starchaser.), the piece he is seeking interns for is designed to prevent a nuclear war between Israel and Iran. Not wanting to shock anyone later on, he reveals this lofty aim in the very first paragraph.
From there, the “artist” (And I use that term loosely.) goes on to talk about his background. In his totally serious posting, the man writes that he is the real life Superman and that for “every mythical portrayal of the chosen one…..there also exist real world versions of all the other characters in the story”. Did you know Oracle actually lives in Santa Monica? How neat!
From there, the posting goes on to discuss other boilerplate insanity. Apparently, Kim Kardashian is the real Wonder Woman, Elon Musk is the actual Batman and someone should make a religion centered around the worship of Harry Potter, appropriately called Potterism. Being the curious guy that I am, I decided to give Mr. Massler/Starchaser a shout to see if he wanted to talk about his project. After his first response, I decided to Google the fellow’s name.
Apparently, Mr. Massler previously got into trouble with the law for stalking Donald Trump’s daughter Ivanka. Now, he was out there on the web, possibly trying to lure people into something similar. I can’t know for certain as I don’t possess the same warped mindset. Not sure about whether to ask him about the past incident, I decided to be bold and go for it. Below, you can find the initial question I asked as well as some of the increasingly deranged responses.
To start off, I went with the following query.
“I ran your name Justin and it looks like you were once in legal trouble for stalking Ivanka Trump. Care to respond?”
He replied with this.
“Yeah I was framed. It was a Borat joke and Ivanka knew it but she framed me”
And got more…..
“Don’t talk jive at me or my bros in ISIS will take care of you by chopping your head off for supporting lies because lying journalists like you deserve to get their heads chopped off for real and I’m not joking on this one got it? Rupert Murdoch is The Antichrsit and you fucks are going to start dying if you keep spreading his lies.”
“I’m the real Will Hunting and you’re nothing but a fucking maggot beneath my shoes. I’m The Chosen one and you’re a soulless worm, got it you fucking worthless piece of human dog shit? You’re nothing but trash and you have no right to even talk to me anymore coming at me like you think for one minute you own me. I’ll Break Rupert Murdoch in half just like I’ll break you in half because I’m the most powerful man on Earth and I destroy all falsehood and lies with total Divine Judgment fuckface.”
And even more…..
“This is war and Rupert Murdoch is the enemy and if you side with Rupert Murdoch you side with The Antichrist against Jesus Christ so choose your side wisely kid. You made a mistake but you can straighten your act up, don’t get thrown in Hell, this is Revelation and those who join Murdoch will perish in flames now. So switch sides now before you destroy your whole life siding with a known loser like Murdoch.”
“Didn’t mean to scare you but Murdoch’s tricks don’t work on me anymore and I sense what you’re doing before you do it so I’m just scaring you straight like in Scared Straight Prison Shows so you abandon Murdoch’s corrupt system of lies before you get yourself damned. I’m doing you a favor so you don’t follow The Antichrist who is Rupert Murdoch or the False Messiah who is Jared Kushner and Ivanka is the Whore of Babylon.”
Listen, I don’t agree with Donald Trump on anything, but if he wanted to use connections to have this nut locked away in a psych ward, I’d be ok with it. It’s risky to let these kinds of people wander the streets. Although they may not act, the risk is still sadly present. Remember, we all ignored the Columbine Gunmen before that tragedy.