Andromeda, you’ve Lost Me
Hey guys, it’s me here with another installment of weird musings that are only at home on my blog and no other corner of the internet. This week, I dipped my time back into Mass Effect: Andromeda, the latest release from one time acclaimed RPG maker and now EA branding tool Bioware. Previously, I was doing an on-going article surmising my adventures in the game that I eventually intended to finish in an epic style when something rare happened to me personally.
I lost interest in the game I was playing.
At first, things started out fine. I woke up on the human colony ship, went through the introductory mission and recruited all the fuckable squad mates that come standard in games like this and began to make my way across the richly designed open-world shooting environments. But then, like a meteor that falls randomly out of the sky and kills an old lady, the magic ended.
Why was I doing this? Who was that guy? What the fuck is this weird machine-like area that seems like a shameless rip-off of the forerunner installations from Microsoft cash cow Halo?
Maybe it was issues in my own life distracting me, but as time went on more questions piled up and things that didn’t bother me previously began now to gnaw at my tolerance for bullshit.
If this is a new galaxy, shouldn’t the aliens in it be a little more fucking imaginative? Why are they bi-pedal once again and in possession of other common human-centric characteristics? That is so incredibly lame and lazy. Don’t give me Jaal the genitalia headed alien (Though he is written well.) and the laughable Kett antagonists. Give me an alien species that’s a sentient cloud of gas that only communicates by changing color or only crawls on the ground like snakes and doesn’t have any limbs what so ever. Those would have been far more interesting choices.
And though it didn’t bother me before, I found it so absurd that species in a whole other galaxy already knew how to speak English by the time the player came along. That’s dumb. Learning a new language (Even with terrific technology.) is never an easy thing to do. They should’ve had a communication barrier in place, it certainly would’ve made confrontations more tension filled.
Ultimately, though I got this game for free, I find myself wishing at the present moment that I had never bothered with the thing. Most of the characters were flat, the narrative which started out strong became very dull and some of the plot points made no sense what so ever. I hope that if ever a sequel is made (And that is not guaranteed.), some things are drastically altered. Too many more games like this that just suck my enthusiasm away and destroy it and I’ll likely end up drifting away from the medium, and that is a scary thing to consider in many ways.
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